About a week later, I again passed through the room where K and the young lady were talking together. The moment the young lady saw my face, she burst out laughing. I should probably have immediately asked what was so funny. Instead, I silently went on to my own sitting room. Because of that, K was unable to call out his usual "Just got back?" The young lady seemed to at once open the sliding door and go into the living room.
At dinner, the young lady said I was a strange person. Even then, I ended up not asking why I was strange. I only noticed that the mistress shot a glare-like look toward the young lady.
After the meal, I took K out for a walk. The two of us went around from behind Denzūin, circled the street by the botanical garden, and came back out below Tomizaka. As walks went, it was not a short one, yet very little was said between us. By nature, K was a more reticent man than me. I was not much of a talker either. Still, as we walked, I tried as much as possible to start conversations with him. My subject was mainly the family we were boarding with. I wanted to know how he saw the mistress and the young lady. But his replies were all impossible to make out as either this or that, and moreover, though unhelpful, they were extremely brief. He seemed to pay more attention to his major subject of study than to the two women. That said, it was around the time the second-year exams were right upon us, so from an ordinary person's standpoint, he was probably the more student-like student. On top of that, he went on about Swedenborg this and that, astonishing ignorant me.
When we successfully finished the exams, the mistress was pleased and said we now had just one more year to go. The graduation of the young lady, which could be seen as the mistress's sole pride, was likewise soon to come. K said to me that women leave school knowing nothing at all. K seemed to hold not the slightest regard for the young lady's lessons outside scholarship—needlework, koto, flower arrangement. I laughed at his thoughtlessness. And so, before him, I repeated my old argument that a woman's worth lies not in such things. He did not particularly refute me. But then, he did not show any air of "I see" either. That pleased me. His tone of dismissal still seemed to look down on women. As a representative of women, the young lady, whom I knew, he apparently did not count as anything at all. Looking back now, my jealousy toward K was already budding quite sufficiently then.
I consulted K about going somewhere for summer vacation. K showed a manner as if he did not want to go. Of course he was not free to go anywhere of his own will, but if I had only invited him, he was also free to go anywhere. I asked him why he did not want to go. He said there was no reason at all. He said it was simply more convenient for him to read books at home. When I insisted that going to a summer resort and studying in a cool place would be better for his health, he said then I should just go alone. But I could not bring myself to leave K behind here. I already did not much like watching K and the household grow gradually closer. If you ask why my heart should sour when things turned out just as I had first hoped, there is no answer. I must be a fool. Unable to keep watching the two of us argue endlessly, the mistress stepped in. The two of us ended up going together to Bōshū.
