第一百七十七章 博须埃为布龙多所作悼词
某天下午——这个时间的特殊意义后文自会显现——默城雄鹰正懒散地靠在缪尚咖啡馆的门框上。他那姿态活像休假中的女像柱，只是手里没托着重物，托着的不过是自己的冥想罢了。他凝望着圣米歇尔广场。背靠某物等于站着躺卧，这种姿态倒不招思想者讨厌。默城雄鹰正毫无愁绪地思索着前两日在法学院遭遇的一桩小不幸——这件事多少改变了他那本就模糊的个人未来规划。
沉思并不妨碍马车经过，也不妨碍沉思者留意那辆马车。默城雄鹰那双漫无目的游荡的眼睛，在半梦半醒间瞥见一辆双轮马车正缓步行过广场，仿佛犹豫不决。这辆轻便马车是来接谁的？为何慢吞吞地行驶？雄鹰仔细打量。车里坐着个青年，身旁放着车夫；青年面前搁着个颇为鼓胀的手提包。那包向路人展示着缝在布面上的一张卡片，上面用黑色大字写着：马吕斯·彭眉胥。
这名字让雄鹰换了姿势。他挺直身子，朝马车里的青年喊道——
"彭眉胥先生！"
被叫住的马车停了下来。
那青年似乎也深陷沉思，抬眼应道——
"呃？"
"您是马吕斯·彭眉胥先生？"
"没错。"
"我正找您呢，"默城雄鹰接着说。
"这话怎么说？"马吕斯问道——正是他本人；他刚离开外祖父家，眼前是张从未见过的面孔。"我不认识您。"
"我也不认识您，"雄鹰答道。
马吕斯寻思自己遇上了恶作剧者，大街上莫名其妙的一场玩笑。他此刻心情不佳，便皱起眉头。默城雄鹰泰然自若地继续说——
"前天您没来上课。"
"可能吧。"
"是肯定没来。"
"您是学生？"马吕斯问。
"是的，先生，跟您一样。前天我碰巧去了学校。您知道，人有时会心血来潮。教授正在点名。您不是不知道，这种场合他们特别可笑。第三次点名无人应答，名字就从名单上划掉了。六十法郎打了水漂。"
马吕斯开始认真听。
"当时是布龙多点名。您认识布龙多，他那只鼻子又尖又毒，专爱嗅出缺席者。他狡猾地从字母P开始。我没在意，反正我不在那字母里。点名进行得不错。没人被划掉；全班都到了。布龙多很沮丧。我心想：'布龙多，亲爱的，今天您恐怕捞不着半个牺牲品了。'突然布龙多喊：'马吕斯·彭眉胥！'没人答应。布龙多满怀希望，更大声地重复：'马吕斯·彭眉胥！'他拿起了笔。先生，我天生心软。我赶紧对自己说：'瞧，有位勇敢的伙计要被除名了。注意。这是个真正不守时的凡人。他不是好学生。这可不是那些死用功的书呆子——只知道啃书本的老学究，满腹经纶、神学、科学、智慧，那种四四方方呆头呆脑的家伙；那种天生的别针。这是个体面的懒汉，喜欢闲逛，爱去乡下溜达，勾搭年轻姑娘，追求异性——没准此刻正和我的情人在一起。得救救他。让布龙多见鬼去！'这时，布龙多那蘸满了涂改墨水的笔往墨水瓶里一浸，他那双黄眼睛扫视着教室，第三次喊道：'马吕斯·彭眉胥！'我应了声：'到！'所以您没被除名。"
"先生！——"马吕斯说。
"所以我被除名了，"默城雄鹰补充道。
"我不明白您的意思，"马吕斯说。
雄鹰接着说——
"再简单不过。我紧挨着讲台应到，又靠近门口好随时开溜。教授盯着我看了好一会儿。布龙多——想必他就是布瓦洛说的那只毒鼻子——突然跳到了字母L。L是我的姓。我来自默城，姓爱格朗。"
"雄鹰！"马吕斯打断道，"这姓真棒！"
"先生，布龙多找到了这个好姓，喊道：'爱格朗！'我应声：'到！'布龙多便用母老虎般的温柔盯着我，对我说：'如果您是彭眉胥，您就不是爱格朗。'这句话对您来说或许不太中听，但对我而言简直凄惨。说完，他就把我划掉了。"
马吕斯惊呼——
"我很抱歉，先生——"
"首先，"雄鹰插话道，"我要求允许我用几句饱含深情的悼词来赞美布龙多。我就当他死了。他那干瘪、苍白、冷漠和气味都不需要怎么改动。我要说：'审判大地的，应当受教。此地安眠着布龙多——布龙多鼻、布龙多·纳西卡、纪律之牛（_bos disciplinæ_）、口令猎犬、点名天使。他正直、方正、精确、严苛、诚实、可憎。上帝除他的名，正如他除了我的名。'"
马吕斯又说——
"我非常抱歉——"
"年轻人，"默城雄鹰说，"权当给您一个教训。以后要准时。"
"我实在万分抱歉。"
"别让您的邻居再冒被除名的危险。"
"我非常过意不去——"
雄鹰放声大笑。
"我反倒很高兴。我差点就成了律师。这一除名可救了我。我放弃律师界的丰功伟业。不替寡妇辩护，也不控诉孤儿。没有法袍，没有舞台。除名正合我意。这得感谢您，彭眉胥先生。我打算专程登门道谢。您住哪儿？"
"就在这车里，"马吕斯说。
"富人的标志，"雄鹰平静地回敬道，"恭喜您。您这车一年得花九千法郎租金呢。"
这时，古费拉克从咖啡馆里走出来。
马吕斯凄然一笑。
"这租金我已经付了两小时了，正巴不得摆脱它；不过这里面有段故事，我不知该去哪儿。"
"去我那儿吧，先生，"古费拉克说。
"我有优先权，"雄鹰说，"可我没有家。"
"住口，博须埃，"古费拉克说。
"博须埃？"马吕斯说，"可我以为您叫爱格朗。"
"默城的，"雄鹰答道，"借喻说法，便是博须埃。"
古费拉克坐进马车。
"车夫，"他说，"圣雅克城门旅店。"
当晚，马吕斯便在圣雅克城门旅店一间毗邻古费拉克的房间里安顿下来。
On a certain afternoon, which had, as will be seen hereafter, some
coincidence with the events heretofore related, Laigle de Meaux was to
be seen leaning in a sensual manner against the doorpost of the Café
Musain. He had the air of a caryatid on a vacation; he carried nothing
but his reverie, however. He was staring at the Place Saint-Michel. To
lean one’s back against a thing is equivalent to lying down while
standing erect, which attitude is not hated by thinkers. Laigle de
Meaux was pondering without melancholy, over a little misadventure
which had befallen him two days previously at the law-school, and which
had modified his personal plans for the future, plans which were rather
indistinct in any case.
Reverie does not prevent a cab from passing by, nor the dreamer from
taking note of that cab. Laigle de Meaux, whose eyes were straying
about in a sort of diffuse lounging, perceived, athwart his
somnambulism, a two-wheeled vehicle proceeding through the place, at a
foot pace and apparently in indecision. For whom was this cabriolet?
Why was it driving at a walk? Laigle took a survey. In it, beside the
coachman, sat a young man, and in front of the young man lay a rather
bulky hand-bag. The bag displayed to passers-by the following name
inscribed in large black letters on a card which was sewn to the stuff:
MARIUS PONTMERCY.
This name caused Laigle to change his attitude. He drew himself up and
hurled this apostrophe at the young man in the cabriolet:—
“Monsieur Marius Pontmercy!”
The cabriolet thus addressed came to a halt.
The young man, who also seemed deeply buried in thought, raised his
eyes:—
“Hey?” said he.
“You are M. Marius Pontmercy?”
“Certainly.”
“I was looking for you,” resumed Laigle de Meaux.
“How so?” demanded Marius; for it was he: in fact, he had just quitted
his grandfather’s, and had before him a face which he now beheld for
the first time. “I do not know you.”
“Neither do I know you,” responded Laigle.
Marius thought he had encountered a wag, the beginning of a
mystification in the open street. He was not in a very good humor at
the moment. He frowned. Laigle de Meaux went on imperturbably:—
“You were not at the school day before yesterday.”
“That is possible.”
“That is certain.”
“You are a student?” demanded Marius.
“Yes, sir. Like yourself. Day before yesterday, I entered the school,
by chance. You know, one does have such freaks sometimes. The professor
was just calling the roll. You are not unaware that they are very
ridiculous on such occasions. At the third call, unanswered, your name
is erased from the list. Sixty francs in the gulf.”
Marius began to listen.
“It was Blondeau who was making the call. You know Blondeau, he has a
very pointed and very malicious nose, and he delights to scent out the
absent. He slyly began with the letter P. I was not listening, not
being compromised by that letter. The call was not going badly. No
erasures; the universe was present. Blondeau was grieved. I said to
myself: ‘Blondeau, my love, you will not get the very smallest sort of
an execution to-day.’ All at once Blondeau calls, ‘Marius Pontmercy!’
No one answers. Blondeau, filled with hope, repeats more loudly:
‘Marius Pontmercy!’ And he takes his pen. Monsieur, I have bowels of
compassion. I said to myself hastily: ‘Here’s a brave fellow who is
going to get scratched out. Attention. Here is a veritable mortal who
is not exact. He’s not a good student. Here is none of your
heavy-sides, a student who studies, a greenhorn pedant, strong on
letters, theology, science, and sapience, one of those dull wits cut by
the square; a pin by profession. He is an honorable idler who lounges,
who practises country jaunts, who cultivates the grisette, who pays
court to the fair sex, who is at this very moment, perhaps, with my
mistress. Let us save him. Death to Blondeau!’ At that moment, Blondeau
dipped his pen in, all black with erasures in the ink, cast his yellow
eyes round the audience room, and repeated for the third time: ‘Marius
Pontmercy!’ I replied: ‘Present!’ This is why you were not crossed
off.”
